Sunday, July 31, 2011

Big Dance

Sushila and Owen, married July 30th, 2011.

Big Dance

Today there's a wedding on ridge
for Shushila and Owen, long destined,
which promises to be wild ride
with 150 guests saying they're coming,
I'm in charge of parking cars
as my gift, it makes sense
since I know lay of land
where ground is hard, soft, questionable,
these events have their own destiny
just like Woodstock or Burning Man,
once it starts momentum takes over
and people in group find themselves
entering altered state just from experience,
often discovering and expanding worldly perceptions
by interacting within realm of joy
shared in open hearted love celebration
listening music of Existence, 'Source' playing
life affirming melodies of the miraculous
when two souls find each other,
resonating, vibrating at frequency both share
while traveling on winds that surprise,
energize, and inspire those who witness
their coming together in committed manner,
this is not about living small,
instead large, without restricting expression
of wonderful pinnacle in 'Big Dance'.

Saturday, July 30, 2011


Running approach to re-enter Monterey Bay, at Seabright Beach in Santa Cruz, California.
(photo by Art Durand Photography)


How we address an opportunity
is great predictor of outcome
as journey determines ultimate destination,
wherein pressure to perform admirably
can constrict naturally flowing grace
free from expectation's attached desire
that often sabotages any success
when a push, pull process
brings distorted atmosphere effecting everything,
everyone feeling an underlying dissonance
from lack of freedom, creativity,
and relaxed state that opens
ability for profound acute focus
while riding constantly changing waves,
rather settle into expansive trust
of one's capacity to adapt,
be flexible, amid insecure world
ruled by unpredictability as norm
which happens every precious moment
whenever virgin territory is entered,
being aligned with this takes
vulnerable courage to loosen grip
releasing tight control that anticipates
worst case, often attracting such,
instead sensitively steer subtle energies
with confident approach until completion.

Friday, July 29, 2011


Ready to 'spar' at Seabright Beach, Santa Cruz, California.
(photo by Art Durand Photography)


On the other side of friction
that gets expressed by 'sparring' partners
is land where milk and honey
flow freely as love, appreciation, joy,
if each participant has essential opportunity
to reveal their truth, the underpinnings
of their actions, words, taking responsibility
for having 'called in' dissonant experience
so to deepen, learn, grow expansively
this 'human' being 'spirit' in physical
realm that often challenges our sensibilities
and sanity, because we weren't created
just to keep adapting to stressors
an imbalanced society levies on citizens,
like some inhumane penalizing regressive tax
incurred for incarnating in this world
where 'original sin' Christians talk about
separates us from celebrating individual uniqueness,
infecting people with fear of unworthiness
believing there's nothing to say, do,
capable of inaugurating a shared consciousness
with others encountered during daily ritual
in theater of the absurd, lonely
though in crowd, shuffling through debris
filled streets of disconnected shallow conversation
hiding foundational understandings civilization depends upon.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Speak Up

Peaceful gray waters reflecting fog at the Santa Cruz Yacht Harbor.

Speak Up

Children often receive mixed messages
to be seen, not heard
unless asked, then vocalize loudly
enough while being respectfully humble
around adults, using courteous manners
purposefully dodging controversy and discomfort
so as to blend in,
peer criticism at school dampens
urge to opine, stand out,
when problems need appropriate address,
there are relationships to navigate
whether at work, with lover,
in town during daily interactions,
where not wanting 'boat rocked'
that may disrupt peaceful co-existence
has us 'biting our tongue',
even as tension builds inside
becoming exponential friction if unspoken,
it's huge shift to claim
one's voice and self authority
whenever opportunity arises for intervention,
especially unhealthy longstanding dysfunctional dynamics
born from unchallenged distorted habits
the 'user of' cannot perceive,
until in courageous friendship act
we speak up about observations.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Focus Attention

Wing on her pillow focusing attention on being relaxed.

Focus Attention

Contemplating, looking out upstairs window
I witness bat attempting familiar
return to day resting place
between rain gutter and fascia,
'Wing' sleeps on floor pillow,
'BK' grooms his feline fur
next to me on couch,
friend Sean is awake downstairs
here for work this week
furthering projects, beautifying, birthing creativity
in surprising and graceful ways
according to many intricately seen
potential manifestations that have percolated
in my imagination for months,
waiting for perfect juxtaposed ingredients
such as materials, timing, manpower,
willful energy following intuitive knowing
of what wants to unfold
within myriad territories around land,
home, workshop, rearranging 'what was'
into original miracle of delight,
whenever listening well to Guidance
through body, mind, spirit alchemy,
choosing threads of electric joy
resonating from possible million destinies
which remind to focus attention.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Ramping Up

Buddha with bird bath and potted orchid in side garden.

Ramping Up

Often happens
time comes
to get
with it,
keep after
things neglected,
new arrivals,
while dreaming
what's next,
swirling possibilities
cross screen
of consciousness
as witnessing
Buddha mind
picks, chooses,
prioritizes scenarios
as author
who willingly
involves body,
spirit, emotions,
in dance
that co-creates
new world
from old,
channeling energy
ramping up.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Sacred Activism

Gitanjali Lori Rivera, Jennifer Holt, involved with 'Week of Ecstasy' celebrating Rumi.
( interview soon to be 'archived' on

Sacred Activism

It may seem Americans are devoid
of giving back to troubled society
in capitalist world of winners, losers,
where everyone's busy living egocentric life
trying to insure immediate individual survival,
still believing in separation and enemies
that create 'us versus them' mentality
whether with plants, animals, other humans,
constantly wondering what will 'bite them'
when perceiving surroundings as hostilely unfriendly,
yet, there are those seeing otherwise
who recognize interrelated divinely cooperative Universe
united by light, love, joy, beauty,
behind, underneath, in all human distortions,
witnessing the dimly lit spirit inhabiting
every person living in quiet desperation
having been there, and escaped sentence
to be forever imprisoned by fallacies
prior generations imbedded in 'collective consciousness',
they want to be of service
brightening the 'life force flame' waiting
for encouragement to blaze in fullness
from seat of powerful 'soul authority',
acting as kindling, mirroring each other
through appreciation, kindness, compassion, becoming allies
joining superordinate goal deemed 'sacred activism'.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Following Threads

Part of my ridge top homestead in the Soquel hills, viewed from unruly garden area.

Following Threads

Forever things to do
around house, in workshop,
garden, and on land,
often coming across incomplete
project that patiently waits
for life giving hand
to usher next phase
into manifestation, gracefully so,
as I'm unwilling anymore
during 'mature' years to
orchestrate something without finesse,
otherwise dangerous break occurs
inside mental, emotional wellbeing
because what's been created
reflects stressful process used
which often ends badly
with results viewed negatively
through hindsight, from seeing
how perfect solution arises
when given more thought
outside any urgent need
shouting 'Get it done!',
remembering journey is destination
and beautiful life tapestry
is executed slowly, enthusiastically,
following threads of joy.

Saturday, July 23, 2011


Exotic flower blossom seemingly emitting 'light' from core.
UCSC Arboretum, Santa Cruz, California.


There's more than meets the eye,
much harder to see when moving
fast in progress oriented capitalist world
propelled by fear of not enough
without vision depicting shared cooperative life
connected by 'superordinate goal' worth attaining
that allows time to savor miracles,
each entity in marvelously diverse Creation
really meeting others with kinesthetic empathy
which opens heart gateway to love
feeling tremendous light emanate through appreciation
while taking in 'wholeness' and 'beauty'
of one who captures our attention,
whether animate or inanimate doesn't matter,
there is exchange of 'bio-photon' radiation
superseding DNA as a health prognosticator
when there's sincere adoration going on
minus some agenda about taking advantage
for temporary pleasure or personal gain,
putting everything on table insures intimacy
where inherent trust and honesty prevail
instead of holding back what's 'true'
because it's embarrassing, or judged unacceptable
in imagination by partner you value,
better to get it out completely
and reveal inner process of soul.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Catch Up

Brother Keith, niece Adrienne, river guide, friend Zeke, and me on Tuolumne River, Calif.

Catch Up

Personal priorities take precedence these days,
not work for money, radio station,
business in general that needs attention,
becoming 'secondary' when friends come visit
only to wait for 'primary' slot
after welcome distraction from duty departs
leaving me to collect myself again,
make lists, remember those over due commitments
to create questionnaire, write blog
entry as 'Program Review Committee' member,
start making calls to organize projects
while peering timeline for other events,
retrieving past, imagining future, though present
for next action that wants expression,
it's like I've traveled side tributary
of river headed toward grand destination
that my soul is purposefully riding
and physical container now lags behind,
fortunately I orchestrate the daily schedule
being own boss as self-employed builder
plus architect of the living design
which is artful story I write,
full of twists, turns, unexpected occurrences,
kachinas, disrupting loosely planned flexible trajectory,
realizing dreams ask for follow through
demanding I catch up with timing.

Thursday, July 21, 2011


Playing guitar on my 50th birthday in the 'Catalyst' garden room. Feb. 18th, 2004
(photo by Art Durand Photography)


At what beat am I optimal
when it comes to high performance
at work, in life, and relationships,
as drummer within adjusts to circumstances
according to some inner soulful musician
who can find most appropriate groove
that feels right in speed, timing,
sensibilities, easeful flow defined as grace,
even in challenging pressure cooker situations
where smile on face depicts attitude
of optimism born from anticipating success,
while a frown says I'm searching
for more accompaniment to emerging song
in way of lyrical poetic symbiosis,
aligning myself with 'what is' now
supported by all of miraculous Creation
encouraging me to shine inherent light
distinctly channeled through this physical form
living the space between notes played,
this takes refined ear for listening
to what heart has in store
leading way toward orchestrating melody waiting,
wafting in slowly from future dreamscape
able to spark enthusiasm for more
dance hammering of thought into form
within rhythms unique to my spirit.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011


My sister Donna, Mom, sister MaryAnn. All mothers who lovingly endure life's challenges.


How much life feels like purgatory
can be a barometer of happiness
and joy taken from mundane activities,
whether working hard in hot sun,
making dinner for hungry family, oneself,
doing laundry, paying bills, cleaning house,
often it's just accepting aging process
more difficult the older we get,
extremely so for mother near 88
where health becomes crisis to bear
while mind runs amok playing tricks,
and fear is companion when alone
with death seeming nearer for her
than those youthfully seeking any distraction
to counterbalance despair in crazy world,
which for thousands of tortuous years
has served up madness to masses
as distorted human beings rape Earth,
defile one another through war, greed,
so out of balance they're blinded
by desperate fight for basic survival,
unable to grasp self-inflicted group misery
born of racism, sexism, religious fanaticism,
classism, building of military industrial complex
so prevalent as to deter visions
of peaceful future we'd lovingly endure.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011


Exotic blossom on plant growing at University of California Santa Cruz Arboretum.


Political leaders deal with 'macro',
throw around big ideas, concepts,
promote grand schemes, potential promise,
look into future for salvation
from present problems of citizens,
economy, military conflict and crises
of confidence threatening their jobs
while feigning sincere compassionate concern,
dodging real reasons for stand
taken, wanting room to move,
bankers, corporate heads, are similar
when vagueness permeates their intentions,
not liking spotlight that scrutinizes
tiniest back room shady deal,
it's not until things fail
within mundane nuts, bolts world
startling people from manufactured reverie
that 'devil in details' arises,
where more scientific approach prevails,
for a time, investigating truth
behind smug best case scenarios
proselytized by those ravaging democracy,
turning discussions into sound bites
large enough to create stereotypes,
unlike botanists who identify plants
by comparing differing specific minutiae.

Sunday, July 17, 2011


My friend Ed Snodgrass, visiting from Maryland, surprised again by Santa Cruz weirdness.


Once energy is expended,
money spent, game over,
to do list done,
house cleaned, grass cut,
garden watered, workers gone,
things back in order,
laundry finished, bed made,
emails answered, blog entered,
rested from sleeping in,
dreams forgotten, food digested,
moon, stars, hidden again
from fog filtered dawn,
there's pause to take
because dear friend arrived
having been years away
remembering old configured home,
different shower, new kitchen,
changed landscape, and workshop,
new motorcycle in shed,
greenhouse attached, trees bigger,
guest trailer now den,
more resources in stacks
laying around waiting use,
wondering what day holds
in way of surprise
that we'll savor after.

Saturday, July 16, 2011


Looking relaxed.
(photo by Art Durand Photography)


Here's a key to high performance
that's difficult accessing when feeling urgency,
or need, caught up in desire
for some accomplishment ego deems important,
a reflection of it's ultimate worth
seen from observer's eye as great,
it involves keeping things in perspective
where all activities have own relevance
which pale when compared to death,
yet fear of this inevitable transition
becomes a hindrance for living fully,
not wanting it to come prematurely
we don't risk our precious significance,
instead cower from anything that resembles
a dying, like failure when striving
to expand into Unknown developmental realms
while learning one step at time
retrieving knowledge and wisdom about 'Self',
finding there's life on other side
of 'poor showing', to be compassionate
when remembering lifelong journey we've traveled,
all those events judged as catastrophic,
unsalvageable, bringing disgrace that appeared unforgivable,
only to realize a strengthening occurred
instilling confident ease toward future adventures,
able to effortlessly relax into Mystery.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Spinning Energy

Sunflower spiral from garden last year.

Spinning Energy

No wonder 'circles' represent wholeness
as container for all things,
where 'spiral' viewed from top
reveals tornado like creative potency
that moves flexibly as needed
delivering change when touching down,
there is no break between
the winds swirling toward future,
they involve everything in path
absorbing person that wants balance,
equanimity, the 'eye within storm',
while caught in paradoxical life
surreally viewed from centered calm,
air thin, feeling infinite pause
of observer who becomes hypnotized
into thinking that nothing moves,
yet recognizes the underlying 'is-ness'
pervading every grain of sand
vibrating at speed to solidify
and be itself, without question
which happens absent any consent,
personified whenever humans get lost
in whirlwind activity containing purpose
moving from 'gut' that knows
how effort, 'what, when, why,'
determines Existence through spinning energy.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

In Order

Surprising genius of the pivoting 'Millenium Bridge' that rotates up for boats to pass under.
Newcastle on the Tyne, England

In Order

Amid chaos of daily life
full of traffic jams, accidents,
any number of unexpected turns
there comes desire for control,
some semblance that gives assurance
we have 'say' in process
to spur progress positively forward,
it could be cleaning house
or taking pictures off walls
with eye toward painting room,
remodeling, putting furniture somewhere else
that begins new environment creation
which ushers in virgin perspective
of original ideas spilling forward,
one influencing another developing matrix
sparking bursts of surprising genius
born from slightest thought impetus,
expansive dream landscape of future,
while playfully in between imagining
what wants to happen next
when using grace, beauty, ease,
as filters pointing appropriate direction,
often coming from nonsensical deliberation
entertaining possibilities whenever they arrive,
visions delivered within cosmic rhythms
in order to reveal Mystery.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

What's Next

Highway from Utah into Colorado on BMW motorcycle.

What's Next

Forever the question that persists
whether asked excitedly or fearfully
it surfaces consciously and unconsciously,
can 'string out' into future
filled with dreams, desires, possibilities,
imagining best, worst case scenarios
which hinge on slightest change
of 'here and now' circumstances,
plus shifts in attitudinal perspective
influenced by recognition of 'truth'
that is personal, profoundly transformative,
even if relatively small, unassuming
in initial scope and breadth,
like butterfly wings affecting weather
on other side of globe,
to find answers requires inquiry
using whole sensory human capacity
fully aware of transitory 'Nature'
this physical world evolves from,
including us, while learning, growing,
expanding, discovering more of 'Self'
as 'Soul' working through 'ego'
so often uncomfortable 'not knowing',
wanting solid sense of direction
and 'intention' to end ambiguity,
forgetting curious wonder about Unknown
creates enthusiasm for what's next.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011


Old 'tin mine' stone structure on coast near St. Agnes, in Cornwall area, England.


To be upfront about dissonance
appearing in body as tension
that disrupts otherwise delightful equanimity
with another during a conversation
is risk which insures intimacy,
a canary in coal mine
needing attention paid to it,
quicker the better the adjustment
when clearing air, discussing differences
as specifically honest as possible,
chips fall where they may
paving way toward new understanding
especially if reinforced by acceptance
on both sides, trusting perfection
of 'truth' as clarifying agent
which when validated in moment
becomes springboard for deeper connection,
not made wrong or attacked
even when comments are unfavorable,
unflattering, depicting any illusory concerns
born from prior hurtful experiences,
it takes trust, knowing oneself,
valuing vitality to not compromise
integrity through inauthentic 'pleasing' exchange,
denials, to 'make it' work,
create problems needing later resolution.

Sunday, July 10, 2011


Spider web necklace with dew from fog.


Defined as place between extremes
referring to heaven and hell,
or in 'attraction, manifestation' terminology
I imagine past and future
doing 'time' in present moment
that feels like sticky web
even when tackling little details
composing achievement on long list
of 'to do's' for completion,
it's being a ghostly shadow
walking in 'what was before'
as new world is slowly
unfolding with me in middle,
a snake sloughing off skin
while 'transformative self' underneath develops
not knowing who I'll be,
except for amazed, like dragonfly
going from water to air
in seeming uncontrollable dangerous process
where many potentialities could sabotage,
yet, somehow miraculous invention succeeds
uplifting 'life' on iridescent wings
becoming fantastic, as if always
destined to perform this alchemy,
no different than butterfly chrysalis
patiently waiting emergence from limbo.

Saturday, July 9, 2011


A unmaintained redwood deck at the end of it's lifespan.


It appears quite evident
there's beginning, middle, end,
in this physical life,
no jumping to latter
before former has occurred,
where foundation comes first
then floor, walls, roof
followed by finishing touches
of paint, tile, carpet,
prior to moving in
though I've known many
living in 'undone' houses
while waiting on finances
that will complete project
though maintenance prolongs engagement,
seemingly same with relationships
when attraction starts process
and dreams become blueprints
born of excited possibilities
dance hammered into reality
through time, attention, emotions,
as purpose creates form
directed by integrity, vitality,
using available resource strategies
to insure balanced advance
calmly allowing natural progression.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Letting It Out

Either I'm trying to communicate something or I'm dancing the 'hula'.
(photo by Art Durand Photography)

Letting It Out

Something has shifted inside me
from work done with healer
around early wounding in childhood
that became distrust of feminine
not to be made mad,
or disappointed by telling truth
about gurgling fear in stomach,
while constantly monitoring emotional tension
and safety within unsafe world
I experienced as 'misunderstood anger'
as youngster knowing no better,
perhaps a dissolving has occurred
finally freed from hiding 'observations'
because I trust 'friendly universe'
filled with compassionate human beings,
one, in particular, a woman
who hears, feels what's said,
engages heart to heart communication
absent of unconscious trauma drama,
she holds basket for kachinas
large, small, or in between,
where I can be myself,
genuine, sincerely honest, troubled, magnificent,
letting what's real shape future,
instead of living 'make believe'
within dreams demanding optimal performance
derailed when letting it out.

Thursday, July 7, 2011


Medieval prison near Edinburgh, Scotland.


With these, people are free,
while answers often imprison us
thinking we're secure in 'knowing'
and so blinders are attached
no longer looking deeper within
the dynamics of everyday living
or lessons around personal history,
plus spoken, unspoken social contracts
we all assume agreement with
treated as unchallengeable solid foundation
on which political world depends,
labeling everything, everyone for control,
displaying confident bravado as proof
that we're right, they're wrong,
within this doubts are discredited,
also fear, only to persist
as underlying resistance toward pursuit
of goal deemed undeniably worthy,
until inquiry into 'gut feelings'
reveal 'set in stone' agenda
is based on misguided pretenses,
calculations, where possibilities suddenly change
for better if caught early,
otherwise great unwinding must occur
from centuries of distorted perspective
because leaders disdained pertinent questions.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Old Friends

Old friends Randy and Erin at 4th of July birthday party for Randy.

Old Friends

Doesn't get much better
than visiting extended family
grown close over years,
loved ones who've witnessed
our antics through time,
highs, lows, failures, successes,
holding hopes of best
for rest of life,
encouraging resilience during struggles
while witnessing the expansion
and contraction we've done,
plus willingness to reach
into Unknown for rewards
made of golden wisdom
gleaned from 'hard knocks',
the familiarity is comforting
like brother, sister siblings
in 'great loving clan'
who recognize 'soul shining'
as interwoven connection ingredient,
sharing laughter, stories, events
which become living mythology
ably resonating in hearts,
minds, spirits, aging bodies
that on cellular level
feel safely at home
with trusted old friends.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011


Co-hosted July 4th radio show 'What's Left' at last 1940's 'RCA' studio, KSCO, AM 1080.
Santa Cruz, California


Is there such a thing
within interrelated country we share,
concepts of autonomy, sovereignty, pale
against backdrop of our planet
spinning in this interconnected galaxy,
or that there's 'chosen' people
found superior to all others
in teeming world filled with
diverse humans and their cultures,
even ownership of 'True God'
becomes laughable when many religions
claim credit, while pagans honor
'Life Force Source' in everything,
today Americans strut their stuff
conjuring simplified 'subjectively leaning' ideals
of what freedom really is,
most are ignorant of history
now reduced to sound bites
by 'talking head' politicians, media,
using buzz words often distorted
when translated to fit agenda
for groups enticing new recruits,
but rarely is responsibility mentioned,
let alone demanded of citizens
to do best, share resources,
get involved using intelligent compassion
many deem contrary to independence.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

My Own

My own little medicine wheel.

My Own

It's after fact hindsight
that recognizes some compromise
I've made to integrity,
often defined as wholeness ...
equated to being 'true'
when engaging 'soul rhythm'
in pursuit of direction
with purpose, rightly timed,
having weighed plans, strategies,
while discerning appropriate actions
to manifest desired result
instilling natural vibrant vitality
surging through maintained body
housing freedom loving spirit
contentedly expressing creative juice,
'presence', in magical moments,
sparking powerful emotional energy
shooting arrow into target
considered a perfect unfolding ...
once dissonance is discovered
there comes adjustment opportunity,
stepping back to breathe,
feel space between worlds
conjured as possible destinies
pursuant to authentic path
making life my own.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Even Possible

Replica sword of 'King Robert the Bruce' of Scotland

Even Possible

When we expand the container
and timetable of dream manifestation
then there's room to breathe
allowing for ease and flow
without any pressure or stress,
wherein good decisions are made
based on careful cogent investigation
into what can be done,
some may call it procrastination
or denying spontaneity for fear
that mistakes could be made,
others might say it's violation
of many common sense principals
proven within human's historic annuls,
such as 'tension = energy = change'
each one dependent on next
where 'space' between first two
robs motivation to accomplish third
since discomfort provides urgent impetus
to 'strike iron while hot',
an ancient wisdom of blacksmiths
who invented 'tempering' for swords
understanding fuel necessary to attain
high burning fire that purges
impurities blocking evolutionary outcome, like
doubting dreams are even possible.

Friday, July 1, 2011


A rebellious witness.
(photo by Art Durand Photography)


I often loathe this,
something in Aquarian nature
or perhaps redhead influence,
even Enneagram Perfectionist 'One'
makes for idealistic zealot
rebelling mostly in mind,
used to publicly express
many 'right way' judgments
that criticized government, capitalism,
any number of things
deemed wrong, screwed up,
but friends and family
tired of the tirades
so I shifted gears,
silently bit my tongue,
began work on 'self',
started looking for good
witnessing personal strides, lessons,
in name of wisdom,
some deeper life understanding
meant to bring happiness,
consistent joy, while playful
on journey through 'space',
where everything is incredible,
diverse, altered, nothing's normal,
making dreams seem realistic.