Monday, March 30, 2009

Garden beds in process/eventual 'sweat lodge' structure/my medicine wheel

Invested Passion

I've been testing odd theories
trusting life's 'perfection and timing'
doing what I can, being patient,
working on my land projects
each one connected to the other
and some headway is made daily
which makes me feel good to see,
enjoying these stretches at home,
yet more money needs to flow in,
pay for continued bills landing
while peering out to future events
wondering what life is asking of me,
so today I follow a thread,
thinking it's 'grace' that called
when 'sweat lodge' was offered
perfect opportunity to drop in,
shift energy, pray deeply, to find
the intention and direction needed,
sparked with inspired guidance,
that will catapult me forward
to wake with 'promise' on my tongue,
then 'praise' for gifts before sleeping,
drawing upon those genius insights
aimed at creating structural foundation
for sustaining the living imperatives
only my invested passion can bring.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Nevada, Sept. weather, 2008
(side road off of  'Extraterrestrial Highway')


Is this simply how it is
when told the universe is expanding,
are humans emulating on 'micro' level,
procreating, consuming, producing more,
and is it possible to reverse momentum,
this 'paradigm', while embracing contraction,
contrary to 'economic growth' model,
but not Nature's, she has seasons,
cycles from birth to death,
seed to fruit, and we do to,
where periods of aging bring gifts
of knowledge, wisdom, life experience,
one leading to the next, to maturity
in degrees, depending our willingness,
contrariness, when caught in contradictions
often wondering what's 'true' for us
on ever changing miracle landscape
while personal 'environment' ... mental,
physical, spiritual, emotional ...
continues to gather layers of residue
from wanted, or unwanted conditions,
yet we get to choose the 'weather',
'whether' to travel the road ahead
without veering from storms looming,
bearing any loss through our tears,
or move onward by picking a new direction.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Ascent on 'Scridain', (Kevin, Mike, Paul)
 Loch Scridain and Ross of Mull in background
 Isle of Mull, Scotland  Feb. 2007


"Persistence." is what Obama said
brings victory in the long run
going after incremental changes
often a slow ascent up mountainside
creeping along with low visibility
as vision shifts according to circumstance,
it is 'creative process' into the 'Unknown'
where trust, faith, past lessons learned,
are part of necessary preparation
while hoping for stamina to persevere,
asking questions to refine our course
paying attention for signs, red flags,
those times to recognize, and celebrate,
having overcome a hurdle gracefully,
to find completion in phases, or overall,
with a 'dream' physically birthed,
this is when plain satisfaction won't do
the 'genius' used to manifest ideas
from resource, assembly, plan and action,
is no small feat on any scale
and demands unique expression of energy
allowing emotions to mark the triumphant
on a cellular level to be remembered,
which cultivates desire, deep willingness,
for unblinkingly facing life's tribulations
knowing 'success' is measured in blessings.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

English garden in  Compton, Surrey, England

Fenced In

I enclosed the garden yesterday
to keep deer out, plants safe,
putting together a makeshift gate
plenty big for wheelbarrow entry
and it's temporary, at least parts,
until I rebuild existing periphery
their wind snapped rotted posts
then a large area will be open
without concern for intrusion,
perhaps like an old English sanctuary
with walls of wood, not stone or brick
which kept all trespassers out,
mine has small places of entry
where a rabbit could do harm
but 'Hammer' the cat is deterrent,
symbolically this is really my mind
readying to sow manifesting thoughts
while the beauty I create enhances
how I feel when greeting the world,
this diverse environment of possibility,
it stands out that I'm alone
doing my private work in preparation
of expansion and inviting friends in
for sharing, celebration, and harvest
though now, my process calls for protection,
being fenced in, guarding my sensory dreams . 

Monday, March 23, 2009

Seabright Beach, Santa Cruz
(photo by Art Durand Photography)

Building Power

"Be strong!" is the directive
that imperative must be embraced,
be in command of your prowess,
natural talents, unique birthright,
do not mistake this as 'hardened'
without sensitivity or open heart,
it is the opposite, yet invulnerable
to slings and arrows thrown at you
from circumstance, fearful humans,
or life's obstacles and challenges,
meet it all with irrepressible resilience,
vigor, confidence, competence, equanimity,
shut out debilitations that linger
past hurt or worry reminding of weakness,
instead take heed to lessons learned
by changing approach for different results
even though while being realistic, "Dream!"
let 'Source' come into you to live,
be, do, inform, as embodied Self
follow intuition, inspiration, guidance,
say "Yes!" to resonate vibrations
turn away from that which demeans,
decreases connection to all good things,
heal what is broken, imagine what's possible,
manifest your potential, by building power.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

In my 'medicine wheel'. 
(photo by Art Durand Photography)

Altered States

This body, it's ganglia of impulses
is so easily effected by us,
not only by food consumed
liquids, vitamins, supplements,
but exercise, our social activities
friends and family we converse with
plus special intimate love connections,
there is animal companion influence,
our environment, urban or rural,
including inner landscape as individual
innate interests naturally drawn to,
what brings joy without question
or disdain from vibrational mismatch,
no doubt our thoughts are potent,
spurring emotions, activating adrenals,
sweeping us high, laying us low
often on roller coaster out of control,
add substance use, or abuse to the mix
and humans can become volatile cocktail
messing with one's chemical makeup
to discover temporary formula for peace,
happiness, love of self and this world,
while our 'soul', the 'spiritual witness',
observes this theater of the absurd,
guiding and encouraging us toward balance,
instilling life, as ceremony, into altered states.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

My girl and constant companion, 'Little Wing'


"Life often reminds me."
'Wing' dog luxuriously reclined
on bed, her cushion,
legs crossed, slowly breathing
through nose, so content
from wood stove heat,
there are no worries,
she is cared for
at ease with life,
loved, often kissed, petted,
and the 'workshop' cats
stretch while they greet
leave their imprinted blankets
to rub against legs,
mine, when feeding them...
in 'Medicine Wheel' praying
bird's soothingly sing praise,
plants, flowers, trees, air,
are still, between worlds,
dawn light reveals fog
lazily enveloping this ridge
softening color and sound
creating a temple sacredness
that slows my heartbeat
finding Nature's peaceful rhythm
as I relax within.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Rainbow  light above my home in Soquel hills

New Season

On the edge of morning fog, Spring,
back in this home of many years,
the beauty of this land healing me,
I consider all that is shifting,
being birthed, subtly and not so,
in the world, nations, humans, myself,
and our great opportunity to create
that which we've only dared dream
for the perfection in timing is 'now',
there are no guarantees of success,
or security, or painless transition,
this life is a risk to 'simply live'
death awaits us with no exception
what we leave is the 'heart of our efforts'
witnessed in love manifested physically
felt emotionally within daily encounters
mystifying the brain to make sense of
as our spirits recognize it in each other
when free to choose without constraint,
or need, for protection from fear scenarios
born of our hideous shadowed history
thinking humanity's character is concrete,
deeply flawed, unshakably engrained,
but it's our light that is constant
and from the darkness we burst forth
to bring a new season of evolutionary change.
50th B-day celebration, 2004, Marc Bass on harmonica

Tuning In

There is no greater imperative
for 'know thy self' is at the root
of understanding life's existence
through singularly unique filters
our 'body/mind/spirit/emotion' entity
that is constantly recreating itself
according to circumstances pressing in
and how we equate, assume, react,
where response reveals inner world,
jerky, graceful, empowered, fearful,
often only seen in the distancing,
days, weeks, years pass for hindsight
to witness missed cues or actions taken
then measured according to criteria
mostly that of family, societal upbringing,
amount of education, our working knowledge,
plus wisdom gleaned or imparted by elders
comparing ourselves to others idolized
whether affections are justified or not
which becomes ground for discovery
depending the depth we choose to dig,
do we passively accept what's fed us
or chew on a wide world of ideas
finding our own individual sustenance
no matter how anyone else does it
by tuning in to what turns us on.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Big Dipper at Santa Cruz Boardwalk  (photo by Art Durand Photography)

Heart Sparks

I get my hopes up
let them rise unabashedly
practicing a form of amnesia
which allows me joyousness
to feel high on emotional scale,
whether quick or slow ascent,
it is roller coaster chugging to peak
and my spirit soars accordingly,
excited anticipation of surprise turns
the unknown thrilling surges
while being tossed, jostled, tested
when trying to stay centered,
with eyes open, attentive to now,
what's coming next, and the past,
at times holding on for dear life,
then others, hands swaying in air
releasing energy in whoops, hollers
until course ends, exhilaration ebbs,
a sense of peace prevails briefly,
becoming empty melancholy loss,
opposite end to pendulum swing
wondering if it all was worth it
only to have strong urge come back,
willing to ride, pay price for 'love',
as heart sparks ignite desire to risk again.

Monday, March 16, 2009

North Rim of Grand Canyon, beyond the guardrail, 2008 motorcycle trip

All I Can

Making headway daily,
(if only to grow older)
always seems to bring expanse
some adding onto myself
hopefully that involves knowledge
calling it 'wisdom' would be cool
if only for personal refinement
supporting my own wild world view
when moving through new experiences
plumbing depths of heart
feeling joy, pain, gain, loss
to discover inherent strength
the resilience to try again
with greater understanding of life
able to finally laugh about it
each trespass and failed effort
especially when love was involved
those times I've come up short
thinking there were things missed
that more could have been done,
or at the very least, differently,
for results show me my 'work'
what still needs clear attention,
though not pretty to look at,
while reaping what I've sewn
doing all I can to make changes.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Scottish Clan women on Isle of Mull, old photo  hung in hotel lobby
Moving Through

Humans are so adaptive
having come this far
to transition so much
history tells of obstacles,
striving victims, villains, heroes,
all with indomitable spirit
until vanquished by death,
time, this weighty world,
our generation, no different,
those before and behind
grouped together by circumstance
who sought something more,
perhaps some existential connection
between Source, Nature, Reality,
where each individual acknowledges
Creation's mind blowing Mystery
within bouts of 'awakening'
falling asleep, numbing out,
when unable to really fathom
the infinite magic here,
all of us united,
'One' teeming 'Life expression',
that can thicken, obscure
everyone's Light at times.
reminding of the challenges
we are moving through.
Friend Rose in bracken field near Rossyln Chapel in Scotland

Collecting Myself

The world is contracting, 
well, humans are anyway
with latest financial strive
from greedy over extension
out of balance risking,
where energy is dissipated,
too much to manage,
in territories far flung
that need caring attention
so subtleties are known
in each particular field,
yet control isn't it,
we need a marriage
between left, right brain,
masculine, feminine, art, science,
more, a holistic approach,
demanding creative, smart access
to all parts within
calling upon poetic grace
our childlike birthright joy
while tuning into passion
what brings us alive
for sake of happiness
which is life's gift
given back and forth
when collecting myself fully.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Train in England with Lake District in background

What Works

Patiently I'm making strides
spurts and sputters have shifted
as a smooth grace prevails
beginning to see things manifest
in accumulated small changes,
and I feel like a locomotive
having found right fuel mix
to propel myself up slippery slopes,
tight turns, those steep grades
that threaten to suck me back
from the sheer weight of dreams,
those I pull behind as boxcars
filled with ideas, possibility, potential,
if for some reason I'd try to stop,
even when tracks showed a fork
I've been able to navigate direction
willing to accept 'what is', now,
being realistic with life's circumstances
listening to Source showing the way
while continuing to live, love, laugh,
find the silver lining in all things
every event that comes as surprise,
contrary to my hopes and prayers
striving onward, a steady 'conductor',
on course to find what works.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Kevin at Seabright Beach
(photo by Art Durand Photography)

Show Up

Everyday we're asked
when waking from slumber
to arise, meet this miracle,
in all it's splendorous existence
no matter the conditions,
some mornings are easier than others
depending on health, state of mind,
life's many concerns calling
that challenge our equilibrium, 
and it's our desires,
the passions that excite
deep inspiration inside us,
dreams we want to manifest,
which instigate emotional energy
pumping vibrance into senses
as we become truly alive,
anything contrary is a sign
a red flag, to stop, listen,
be curious about what's needed
so vitality reigns supreme,
often that means leisure,
get off the work treadmill,
view art, hear music, sing,
play in ways that rejuvenate
for future ability to show up.
Ben Mor, Isle of Mull, Scotland

Cutting Back

The world is being asked,
more likely severely prodded,
to begin reducing consumption 
become conscious of it's movements
how it thinks and believes
about what's been normalized
unquestioned in so many realms
and I've never been big fan
of capitalist system born into,
no one asked for my vote on it,
where I'd thunderously say 'NO!!'
wanting equality and fairness instead
a sharing of resources, not exploitation,
ridding the world of poverty, insecurity,
so we can all can live in peace
bring out our unique gifts of beauty
enhancing the space we live in
being healthy in mind, body, spirit,
plus emotions, that have such power
when propelling one's clear aim
toward what is good, right, authentic,
from our deepest essential yearning
for manifesting our true soul work
that which no one else could give
in the moment, or our lifetime,
while cutting back on extravagance.

Friday, March 6, 2009

My 'croft' window view, Kintra, Isle of Mull, Scotland


In between storms
sun shines brilliantly
unobstructed beauty viewed
through one's eyes
heartening the soul
that there's reprieve
always some change
waiting to happen
nothing is permanent
security an illusion
perhaps hope also
life unfolds itself
warts and all
yet we choose
what to appreciate
focus upon daily
forming a discipline
which effects manifestation
from our acts
large or small
becoming the frame
lens, filtered receptor
pane of glass
streaked, dirty, clear
our final portraits,
seen from windows.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Hogminay Fireworks,  Kinloch, Isle of Mull 2006

New Information

In this ever changing world
I make sense according to input
the knowledge gathered and retained
along my 'journey song' path
and often current data can color
or reframe many life experiences
perhaps finally understanding 'why'
I chose some way of acting out
thinking at the time it was right,
truly who I was, never to vary,
only to find otherwise years later
that meaning and truth shift
on this slippery slope of reality
which takes balance to navigate,
being able to adjust one's center,
keep coming back to what is,
my constant responsibility to influence,
be self author of my existence
mustering as much creative power
this mind/body/heart/soul can
while intuiting my feelings for grace,
ease, and flow which will define me,
in high expression, from innate abilities
those that often lie dormant, waiting
for new information to bring them to life.
Mileage sign near Kintra, Isle of Mull, Scotland


Imagine everything is a sign
with no inherent worth per se
except for how we measure it
by using thoughts, having emotions,
sensing it by internal antenna
gauging vibrations and frequency,
becoming the storyteller, director,
while making our daily choices
according to some mysterious matrix
uniquely encoded within our cells
specific to our own personal DNA
even as we share general traits
being human in this physical world,
and what if nothing really mattered
when grasped while taking last breath
realizing we had the power of creation
that nothing stood in our way
except ourselves, our socialized beliefs,
or stuck patterns from life's trauma
but essentially we were always free
instilled with inherent nature of joy,
as birthright, our child self knew
in the beginning, entering this miracle,
where, once in alignment consciously
we could fathom graceful creative path,
correcting course as implications were felt.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Scottish friends on Isle of Mull at my Feb. 18th 2007 birthday/going away ceilidh


There is no getting away from it
always bumping or rubbing up against
whether mentally with river of thoughts,
past memories coloring today's perceptions
and those informing a possible future
or our constant physical proximity,
the ever changing environment crowding in
influencing our senses to open or close
to what we see, hear, smell, taste, feel
even as the unnoticed enters the subconscious
all of it spilling into this 'life experience',
animals, plants, people we come to know
as family, friends, acquaintances and such
each carrying unique overall vibration
plus specific nuance that effects us
with positive or negative emotions
depending on some ethereal chemistry
perhaps activated by tone, speech, touch,
whether they remind us with visual links
of some intangible combination we like,
dislike, can tolerate, or really love,
often times filling a personal vacancy
supplying us with affection we lack,
are unable to give ourself somehow,
becoming a reflection for what's needed
sparking associations to the truth we've missed.
 Lighthouse and Wharf  from Seabright Beach, Santa Cruz


Some say this is what life is, 
atoms, neurons, active ingredients
even inert substances, interacting,
now we find thoughts spur on adrenals,
fluids course associated with value,
depending if positive, negative, or neutral,
flowing into and flushing our system as affect
until we react with fight, flight, or freeze
perhaps not really agreeing to any
consciously, as our body runs old program
some learned response from past
contrasting with an empowered decision
that lets in emotions to be fully felt
to gather wisdom from different parts
activated in situations, such as 'personas',
and often we are thrown into mystery,
the unfamiliar or previously denied,
territories waiting to be discovered
which flesh out deeper understanding
expand awareness, compassion, trust,
reaffirming that we adapt, survive,
most trauma or drama encountered
when living what is true each moment,
though in comparison it feels less than,
tentative, remembering resourceful times
our chemistry brought out the best in us.